Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child by John Gottman is a practical parenting guide that emphasizes the importance of nurturing children’s emotional intelligence as a foundation for lifelong success, resilience, and strong relationships. Gottman introduces the concept of “Emotion Coaching,” a five-step process that helps parents guide their children through understanding and managing emotions rather than ignoring, dismissing, or punishing them. The book explains that children who learn to recognize and regulate emotions grow up to be more socially adept, academically successful, and better equipped to handle life’s challenges.

Gottman outlines the five key steps of Emotion Coaching: (1) becoming aware of the child’s emotions, (2) recognizing emotional expression as an opportunity for intimacy and teaching, (3) listening empathetically and validating the child’s feelings, (4) helping the child label emotions in words, and (5) setting limits while also problem-solving together. He stresses that negative emotions like anger, fear, or sadness are not problems to be eliminated but opportunities for growth and connection. The book also contrasts Emotion Coaching with less effective parenting styles, such as dismissive, disapproving, or laissez-faire approaches, highlighting their long-term consequences on children’s emotional health.

Through real-life examples, exercises, and practical advice, Gottman helps parents develop empathy, patience, and communication strategies that strengthen the parent-child bond. He also addresses common challenges—such as sibling rivalry, tantrums, and discipline—by showing how Emotion Coaching can be applied in these situations. At its heart, the book encourages parents to view emotional moments not as inconveniences but as chances to teach children about self-awareness, empathy, and resilience. Ultimately, Gottman empowers parents to raise emotionally intelligent children who are capable of navigating relationships, managing stress, and leading more balanced, fulfilling lives.